In
some parts of the world, Africa in particular, Nigerian movies reign
supreme, and the actors are semi-gods. With their repertoire of popular
movies, they have undoubtedly mended cracks in the union of some
viewers, but then, many of their own marriages have been characterised
by heartbreaks, separations and divorces.
They
have made their way into the hearts of millions of people, who dream to
be like them. But either at home or abroad, there is one thing none of
their fans will pray for —failed marriages and heartbreaks.
This
development seems to be more rampant among the movie stars. While some
of them have remained eligible spinsters/bachelors, those that managed
to walk down the aisle barely sustain the momentum. The list of movie
stars with failed marriages is endless, and with the recent decision of
actress Laide Bakare to walk out of her marriage to Mr. Okunfulire, the
last has not been heard.
Laide
Bakare, after about three years of denying that there are cracks in her
matrimonial home, has eventually walked out of her marriage. In the
early hours of 3 May, she officially announced through her publicist,
Folorunsho Hamsat, that her marriage has hit the rocks.
Laide Bakare: Opted out of her marriage
The
official statement from her publicist reads thus: “We would like to
announce to the general public on behalf of Nollywood star actress,
Laide Bakare, that she has officially opted out of her relationship with
Mr. Okunfulire, her former husband.
“While
it lasted, the actress showed the utmost level of maturity, in spite of
the ‘glaring injustice’ from her former husband. Laide has endured the
marriage with Mr. Okunfulire for whom she displayed total affection. But
things fell apart when she discovered that she was indeed married to a
man with a legally married wife and two children not a single man she
thought he was as told her by Mr. Okunfulire when the relationship
started.
“But,
being a celebrity who has become a model to young persons in the
society, coupled with the need to exercise decorum, she has kept fate
with the marriage until lately when she could no longer continue and
then called it quits. Her former union with Mr. Okunfulire produced a
beautiful child, Similoluwa who is nicknamed Chelsea.”
The
Yoruba actress also announced that she has moved on by settling down
with another man, Mr. Tunde Oriowo. She claimed that her relationship
with the latter began late last year, a development that has been
criticised.
Barely
a week after this announcement, Mr. Okunfulire, who is based abroad,
opened a can of worms in an interview with a soft-sell magazine. He
claimed that Laide is still his wife, though there have been cracks in
their marriage because “she sleeps around.” Okunfulire added that he
only learnt of his wife’s statement on the purported breakup on social
media.
Laide Bakare’s sordid tale is just one of the numerous heartbreaks and marriage break-up scandals in the movie industry.
Many
female entertainers in Nigeria are victims of this. It is either they
have a broken marriage or don’t even have one at all. Some of them have
blamed it on the society. They claimed that most Nigerian men have low
self esteem, and cannot differentiate between their woman’s real
character and make-belief. They argued further that an average Nigerian
man will not be comfortable with his wife, fiancée or girlfriend, as the
case may be, being smooched by another man in a movie.
They
also blamed the media. The media, according to actress Benita Nzeribe,
has broken many celebrity relationships with their sensational gossips.
“No mother would read such scandalous stories and still allow her son to
marry such lady. The media is not helping matters. The most painful
aspect of it is that most of the things they write about us are not
true.”
But
Asiwaju Benson Akindeju, the producer of television dramas –Family
Ties, Face-2-Face and Nowhere To Be Found, opined that the female
entertainers, actresses in particular, should work more on their
personality, rather than blame the society or media for their inability
to get married.
Akindeju
said the problem is more complex than what most people can imagine. “I
think the problem starts with their inability to manage stardom. They
could be humble at the initial stage of their career, but the moment
fame comes, they tend to lose everything, forgetting that no matter the
situation, an African man would always want to command respect from his
wife.”
He
added that most of them are so arrogant that they can’t even listen to
simple corrections on set. “I have had cause to walk some of them off
my set for insubordination. Most of them cannot manage stardom and it
is a big problem. They always forget that nothing lasts for ever. If you
are the best actress today, someone must surely take the baton from you
tomorrow. So whatever you manage to achieve within your active reign is
what you will live to remember. No matter her fame or achievements, a
woman without a husband cannot be regarded as a successful person.”
Having
played roles where they teach viewers many lessons about marriage and
relationships, one would simply imagine that these actresses have one of
the best homes or relationships, but the reverse is obviously the case.
The
list of Nollywood actresses facing marital challenges seems to be
endless. While some have tasted broken marriages, others have continued
over the years to be eligible spinsters, and it has become an issue of
growing concern. Many of the marriages break up on grounds of infidelity
and battery.
Chika Ike: Lost her marriage to infidelity and assault
Chika
Ike, one of the most beautiful Nigerian actresses, got married to Tony
Eberiri in 2006, but a few years later, the union hit the rocks
following allegations ranging from infidelity to assault. The actress,
who filed for divorce, said in an interview: “I have a lot of friends
who would have left their marriages but because of the African society,
their in-laws, what people will say or other factors, they stay. We’ve
heard a lot of deaths caused by bad marriages and before the death,
there would have been signs, things would have been happening leading up
to that. I think it has to do with age and many other things like
compatibility and not being true to yourself in the marriage. Everybody
has a limit. There are some things in marriage that you might not be
able to stand. Some people’s limit might not be my limit. My limit might
be somebody’s starting point.”
One
of the most shocking was that of Fathia and Saheed Balogun. The much
celebrated union hit the rocks over multiple allegations of infidelity,
and efforts by influential personalities in the country to settle their
differences fell on deaf ears.
Eucharia Anunobi: Quited over constant battery
Actress
Eucharia Anunobi, who is now a pastor, called it quits with Charles
Ekwu, the father of her son, Joshua, a few years after they got married.
Eucharia cited constant battery by Charles as the reason she pulled out
of the union. But it was actually Charles that first walked out of the
relationship. He actually abandoned the actress and her son.
At
the tender age of 15, Shan George got married and after bearing two
kids, she walked out of the marriage at 21, alleging that her husband
couldn’t send her to school but rather turned her into a punching bag.
After she graduated from the University of Lagos at the age of 29, she
has tried to get married on two occasions but all to no avail.
Clarion
Chukwurah is no doubt one of the most talented actresses in Nigeria.
She had been married twice; first to the brother of the late Bashorun
M.K.O. Abiola and later to the Oduneyes, but at the moment, she is a
single mother.
Popular
actress, Ayo Adesanya moved out of her matrimonial home over alleged
battery by her hubby, Goriola Hassan, who later blamed Ayo’s
unfaithfulness for his actions. The hitherto rosy relationship hit the
rocks amid controversy.
Frequent
crisis, irreconcilable differences and incompatibility wrecked the
four-year old marriage of actress Foluke Daramola to ex-hubby, Mr.
Adebowale, though she is now married to Kayode Salako.
Fathia
Ibinabo
Fibresima, the National President of the Actors’ Guild of Nigeria, AGN,
is among female entertainers with failed marriages. The Okrika, Rivers
State-born actress has experienced two failed marriages that produced
two children.
Monalisa
Actress
Monalisa Chinda accused her ex-husband, Dejo Richards, of battery and
she moved out of her matrimonial home. The union was blessed with a
daughter. The list of the industry’s personalities with failed marriages
include Bimbo Oshin, Doris Simeon, Kate Henshaw, Moji Olaiya, Fred
Aseroma, Emem Isong and Peace Anyiam Osigwe to mention a few.
Sultry
actress, Omotola Jalade-Ekeinde is one of the few lucky actresses that
have enjoyed a good marital life. In an interview, she identified the
inability of her colleagues to “draw the lines between their profession
and family” as the reason behind many failed marriages.
According
to Omotola, an average African man will not compromise the level of
respect he gets from his spouse, and as a result, the woman,
irrespective of her status or class, must give due respect and time to
her family.
The
multiple award-winning actress cited that for instance, “when you see me
outside, I’m Omo Sexy, the movie star. But at home, I’m the humble and
obedient wife and mother. The moment you fail to realise this, there is
likely to be a problem in your relationship.”
According to Diliora Ndubisi, the spokesman of
Nigerians, the leaders of the African National Congress (ANC) Youth
League in the area instigated some community members to force them out
of their homes.
It
is a village of not more than 30 houses, situated on a plain,
sandwiched between Nasarawa Egon and Lafia in Nasarawa State. It is
about 10km from the expressway leading to Lafia, the state capital. The
people are poor and neglected. The roads are barely motorable and
threatened by gullies expected with the torrential rains. There is no
sign of government presence in Lakyo. The people have no schools,
hospitals, police posts, no pipe borne water; only their farms, their
culture and their Chief Priest.